Programming Forums > Community Forums > Coder's Corner Lounge

crawforddavid2006 · Mar 28th, 2008, 3:48 PM

ok, so the point of this is to just post the best joke, or saying you have heard while programming.

I'll start.

"I have yet to meet a C compiler that is more friendly and easier to use than eating soup with a knife."

and

"Programming graphics in X is like finding sqrt(pi) using Roman numerals."

Ooble · Mar 28th, 2008, 4:54 PM

Quote:

If I have to look at Linux driver code one more time today I swear I'm going to stab you in the eyes with a fork.

Not exactly a joke, but I did shout it out in labs.

Jabo · Mar 28th, 2008, 8:28 PM

It's not rocket science...

wannabe7 · Mar 28th, 2008, 8:55 PM

shit happens...

Grich · Mar 28th, 2008, 10:24 PM

My favourite was found on wikipedia, not sure if it is still there.
"COBOL: Compiles Only Because Of Luck".
I laughed for an hour after reading it.

OpenLoop · Mar 29th, 2008, 9:50 AM

Even more acronyms:
http://www.ahajokes.com/com033.html

Ooble · Mar 30th, 2008, 4:32 AM

From ##php on Freenode, a couple years back:

Quote:

##php is really 'Pretty Horny People'. The computer language is just a cover.

Indigno · Mar 31st, 2008, 3:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Computer Programming Class

Teacher: What is that there?
Me: Um, GOTO?
Teacher: Now, I'm going to be straightforward about this. If that isn't gone by the next time I come around the room that's an F.

I used to Google Basic keywords and plug them in to try to code more efficiently/ lazily than the class taught set of code.

NOTE: this was a BASIC class with mostly freshmen.

Jessehk · Mar 31st, 2008, 8:28 PM

Well I came upon this today and thought it was pretty funny. http://bbs.archlinux.org/

When I tried to mention April Fool's in a thread, it was automatically turned into "Viva la Deutschland".

Some people are actually protesting the change. It's hilarious.
ROFL

Jabo · Apr 1st, 2008, 3:06 AM

This is not computer related, but is language related.

Quote:

Five year phase-in plan for "EuroEnglish"

The European Commission have just announced an agreement whereby
English will be the official language of the EU, rather than German, which
was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's
government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and
has accepted a five year phase in plan that would be known as "EuroEnglish".

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will
make the sivil servants jump for joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour
of the "k". This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have 1 less
letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with the "f". This will make words like
"fotograf" 20% shorter.

In the third year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be
expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
Governments will enkorage the removal of double letters, which have always
ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of
the silent "e"s in the language is disgraseful, and they should go away.

By the 4th year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th"
with "z" and "w" with "v".

During ze fifz year, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords
kontaining "ou" and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer
kombinations of leters. After zis fifz year, ve vil hav a realy sensibl
riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubls or difikultis and evrivun vil find it
ezi to understand each ozer

ZE DREAM VIL FINALI KUM TRU!

Mar 28th, 2008, 8:28 PM	#3
Jabo Not a user? Join Date: Sep 2007 Posts: 308 Rep Power: 2	Re: Best jokes or sayings... It's not rocket science...

Mar 28th, 2008, 8:55 PM	#4
wannabe7 Newbie Join Date: Dec 2007 Posts: 16 Rep Power: 0	Re: Best jokes or sayings... shit happens... __________________ Aspiring Game Designer

Mar 28th, 2008, 10:24 PM	#5
Grich Professional Programmer Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Sydney - Australia Posts: 330 Rep Power: 2	Re: Best jokes or sayings... My favourite was found on wikipedia, not sure if it is still there. "COBOL: Compiles Only Because Of Luck". I laughed for an hour after reading it. __________________ SYNTAX ERROR ...

Mar 29th, 2008, 9:50 AM	#6
OpenLoop Expert Programmer Join Date: May 2005 Location: East Lansing, MI Posts: 663 Rep Power: 4	Re: Best jokes or sayings... Even more acronyms: http://www.ahajokes.com/com033.html

Mar 31st, 2008, 8:28 PM	#9
Jessehk The Oblivious One Join Date: May 2005 Location: Ontario, Canada Posts: 648 Rep Power: 4	Re: Best jokes or sayings... Well I came upon this today and thought it was pretty funny. http://bbs.archlinux.org/ When I tried to mention April Fool's in a thread, it was automatically turned into "Viva la Deutschland". Some people are actually protesting the change. It's hilarious. ROFL __________________ Dr. Zoidberg: [ecstatic] I'm going to a movie... with FRIENDS!

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Best jokes or sayings...