I am so sick of programming and terrible at it...it's embarrassing. I'm a 3rd year University student. The only program I am comfortable writing after three years is "hello world." Yet again I have been assigned to make a program and after almost 2 weeks of attempting to complete it I am back to where I started and have absolutely nothing done. I have developed such a hatred and contempt for the field (not trying to be mean or disrespect anyone or trash talk the IT filed at all) that I just want to quit. I don't even know how I have made it this far or why I even continued. Every program I have written I have had to have some degree of help from lab assistants and demonstrators. It's just pathetic. I am so ashamed of myself. I try so hard but if I don't have help I am just totally lost. I look at examples on the internet but they don't make any sense to me and I can't apply them to my programs unless someone shows me how. I have a final year project due in less than a month now and I don't even know where to start on it. If I can pull out even a third and pass I will be ecstatic. I try so hard to get it done but I Just can't do it and have not even the slightest idea of what to do or where to even begin. I Know your not supposed to say "can't" but how can I not when I have been working on a program for nearly 2 weeks for 4-5 hours a day and haven't made a single step of progress.
I am even more worried about getting a job. I am so in debt from University that I definitely won't be able to get a programming job without getting fired within a week. Even if I could program I would become a suicidal alcoholic. Everyone else is finished with their programs within a week and if I do finish a program (happens very rarely) by myself it's the most inefficient, slow, and disgusting piece of code you have ever seen. My classmates often love to just look at my code and make fun of me for how horrible it is and ask me "why the HELL would you even think about doing that?"
Sorry just had to vent a little....ah..I feel better now
